Margaret Duwe

MADISON- Margaret Louise Hopkins Duwe, age 60, died at home in Madison on Sunday, October 11, 2009. Margaret's life could be summed up in one simple four-letter word. No, not one of those words (though she certainly knew and occasionally used a few), but love. That would be a short and rather unsatisfying obituary, though, so here are a few further details. She was born January 19, 1949, two months premature, at Doctors Hospital in New York City. Her parents, Edward and Margarete (nee Wolf) Hopkins, were warned not to get too attached or even name her (her birth certificate was made out for Baby Hopkins), and she was placed in a heated crib with few expectations of survival. In a precocious exercise of her stubborn and sometimes obstinate nature, she lived and thrived (and was named Margaret Louise). Margaret eventually went home with her parents and older brother, EJ, to an apartment at the top of a five-floor walk-up in Brooklyn, NY, where she lived until graduating from high school (though she, her mother, and her brother spent their summers at her maternal grandparents' farm in...[more]

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eenfield, just outside of Milwaukee). Her family nurtured her natural curiosity, and she pursued a lifelong course of learning that was both broad and deep (which she instilled in both of her children, along with her love of science and teaching). She attended Queen of All Saints ('62) and Bishop McDonnell Memorial High School ('66) in Brooklyn. Then, following in her parents' and brother's footsteps, she attended UW-Madison, where she earned a BS in physics in 1970, an MS in meteorology in 1975, and pursued doctoral research for several years before deciding that it was more important to spend the time raising her kids. While at the university, she greatly enjoyed her many years as a teaching assistant in both Meteorology and Afro-American Studies. She conducted hail research in Colorado for her master's degree and lightning research at the Kennedy Space Center in Florida for her doctoral program. It was in college that she met her longtime roommate and lifelong friend, Marian Duwe (now Hollingshead). Margaret was completely unimpressed by Marian's older brother, Jack, offending his sister by dismissing him as a "stuffed shirt." Reserved though he was, he was also interested in Margaret and very persistent, and they eventually married on September 17, 1979. In the intervening years, it has often been noted that it would be a difficult task to find a better suited or more devoted couple. Together they created a home that, while it would never be featured in Good Housekeeping, was never boring and always overflowing with love. They had two children, Margie and Henry, besides a furred, finned, and feathered menagerie. When Margaret's father died, they invited her mother to move in. Jack's parents, Pearl and Henry Duwe, Sr., joined the household a few years later. Having learned well from her own parents' example, Margaret was the cornerstone of the family's solidarity. She organized and led them in the care of her parents and in-laws as, one by one, they passed through sickness and death. When her daughter, Margie, entered kindergarten at St. James School in Madison in 1987, Margaret volunteered for the occasional lunchroom and playground duty. 'Occasional' playground monitor became 'regular' and eventually 'daily.' Her love of books and teaching also prompted her to volunteer in the school library, of which she eventually became head librarian and teacher of library skills classes (and confused a whole generation of students by not changing the spelling of her name to match the Dewey Decimal System). When her son, Henry, graduated from the school in 2001, Margaret found that she loved her work and the community there so much that she continued on as a full-time volunteer librarian and playground monitor until illness incapacitated her in the spring of 2009. Margaret was also active in her parish, St. Joseph's Catholic Church in Madison, serving on the Altar Society, the funeral committee, and numerous terms on parish council. She also helped to lead a Bible study group, brought Communion to the homebound, and was a dedicated minister of the altar and sacristan. Ever the consummate teacher, she was easily persuaded to teach CCD (youth religious education) at St. Joseph's for twenty years, first in first grade and then preparing second graders to receive the sacraments. She didn't stop there, though, as she also supported her husband's church, Christ Presbyterian in Madison, including sponsoring a child in Rwanda and helping international students practice their English skills. Margaret used to say that when she went into physics she hoped to make a discovery or work on a project that would change the world; instead, she ended up doing it one child at a time. Besides her volunteer activities, she put her two suburbans (the first red-and-white and the next red) to good use hauling kids from school, and she devoted immeasurable time and energy to mentoring students. She opened her house and her arms and her family to anyone and everyone who needed it. Even when she was ill (she was a ten year survivor of breast cancer and lived with lymphoma for four years), her faith, indefatigable spirit, and humble generosity enabled her to continue her service to those around her.Jack always said that he married Margaret for her cherry pie and her mouth. Her cherry pies were indeed excellent and numerous, though even they were overshadowed by her ability to talk. Infectiously gregarious, she had a vast store of knowledge and an inexhaustible supply of stories and could keep both friend and stranger alike rapt for hours at a time. Despite her talent for talking, Margaret was just as good a listener and gained a well-earned reputation as a sympathetic confidante. There were few things Margaret enjoyed more than spending time with her family (and those she counted as such), including attending her children's sporting events and concerts, traipsing along behind her husband and children at trapshoots (which she eventually took up herself after receiving a Beretta 391 as a Mother's Day present), listening to Ladies Must Swing, and chatting with everyone around her. She delighted in cooking, and the twelve-foot dining room table was frequently crowded with family, friends, and good food (and, as the granddaughter of a truck gardener, there always had to be at least three vegetables on the table or it wasn't a real meal). Traveling piqued her fancy, as well, and it was the thrill of a lifetime when Jack sent her to Paris and the British Isles for three months in 2005 with her daughter as guide. The trip itself was delightful, but the real gift was her memories of it, which buoyed her spirits even during the difficult years of illness that followed. Though her feisty spirit prevailed through many physical infirmities, her body eventually gave out, and she died at home wreathed round by the love of family and friends. She is survived by her husband, Jack (Henry John Duwe, Jr.); her children, Margie and Henry; her brother, EJ (Bernie) Hopkins; her sister-in-law (and former roommate) Marian (Ed) Hollingshead and daughters, Kristy and Dawn (Brian) Whiting; her sister-in-law Barb (Dave) Smith and sons, Chuck (Jaye) and Greg (Lynda); and all those who, over the years, she welcomed into the family (with particular mention of Hazel Tooks, Sr. Loretta Finnerty, O.P., Jason Gonzalez, Michael Keleny, and Elise Meyers). She was preceded in death by her parents. Visitation will be Friday from 3-7pm at the Cress Funeral Home at 3610 Speedway Rd., Madison and Saturday 10-11am at St. Joseph's Church, 1905 W. Beltline Hwy. The funeral Mass will be Saturday at 11am at St. Joseph's. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to St. James School of Madison and St. Mary's School in Bloomington, WI.