In loving memory of

Paula Mary Bilton
September 28, 1945 - March 29, 2019

An incredible wife, sister, aunt and friend passed suddenly and unexpectedly March 29, 2019. Born September 28,1945 to Ruth and King Bilton, Paula lived a life from that day to this -loving, enjoying, supporting and beautifully accepting all with whom she built a connection. Her first relationships, those with her siblings, Pat, Bill, Albert and Buddy, were as special to her in her 73rd year as in her first. And as those brothers and sisters grew to start families of their own, Paula was as important a member in each of those families as she had been to the boisterous Biltons of "Southie" Auntie Paula was adored - and deservedly so. Not only did she offer a smile when needed, an adventure when unexpected, an awesome meal when hungry and a plethora of slideshows to celebrate each and every occasion, she provided the strength of an army when tough times and tragedies came calling.

Friendships were also like gold to Paula who still called her kindergarten friend, Elizabeth weekly and cherished the high school girls get-together annually. To be called friend by Paula meant that you could forever count on her love and support under any circumstances. And, of course, no relationship meant more to Paula than that of her 43 year commitment to her wife and best friend, Terry. Together they built memories and gently, but assuredly, touched the lives of every person they encountered.

Paula lived a life of service as a nurse practitioner and educator in Brooklyn, Queens and Long Island, NY. Her commitment to her work included not only a knowledge base that she nurtured every day of her life, but a sensitivity, a kindness and an honesty she so uniquely shared with patients, their families and her colleagues. Her life of service continued into retirement often volunteering for the Avila community, a community of the Carmelite sisters, a group she deeply cared about for most of her life. Paula never said, NO, to any request for help and that was never more evident than through her work to help her friends of the Carmelite Connection.

Not saying NO, though, was only the half of it, because a YES meant she would go way above and beyond on any initial request for help. She also had an amazing way of holding her head about her while others around her lost theirs. She could acknowledge the mistake or disaster in front of her, but then could quickly begin to carve a plan for recovery. "She was the glue that held us together," said Terry, with a temperament that always saw the silver lining. She was the organizer, the taker care of all the details, and the voice of honesty and reason. She was the pied piper for the family's children. She simply brought out the good in all who had the privilege to know her. "I can't recall one person who didn't like Paula," said Terry, and that alone is the unimaginable legacy she leaves behind.

If a donation in her name is your wish, please consider - The Carmelite Sisters of the Aged and Infirm, 600 Woods Rd. germantown, NY 12526 or online @


Geneva Cregler wrote on Dec 14, 2020:

"I worked with Paula Bolton in Brooklyn at Downstate medical center. She was very intelligent and very caring and always willing to share her knowledge. She was a beautiful lady and I loved her and Terry very much They were the BEST, true professionals and Real PEOPLE. Love always, Geneva Cregler RN Freeport New York"

Sr. Sean Damien wrote on Apr 10, 2019:

"My prayers are with Terry, Margaret and all Paula's family and friends. She will be greatly missed by all who knew her. There will be a void at the gathering of Carmel Connection in November.............Rest in peace and receive the reward prepared for you from all eternity."

Jackie Hanson wrote on Apr 7, 2019:

"Paula, you will be sorely missed by the ladies who lunch. Rest In Peace, dear friend."

Barbara Gaughan wrote on Apr 6, 2019:

"Paula was a treasure. She was a gentle yet strong woman, kind and generous. Her example is the legacy she leaves us. Sincerest condolences to Terry, Margaret and all Paula?s family. Barbara Gaughan"

Anne Mulligan wrote on Apr 6, 2019:

"Will miss our yearly trips to NY to have lunch with our good friend, Sr. Mary Xavier.Catching up on news, and remembering old times. You will be dearly missed Paula. Rest in peace. With much love, Mary Heise, Jackie Hanson, Nancy Kilduff and Anne Mulligan"

Sister Mary Robert Romano, O. Carm. wrote on Apr 4, 2019:

"To: Terry & Bilton Family, My deep & sincere sympathy on the sudden lost of Paula. Her obituary says it all. A wonderful, caring & loving person. She will be missed by this Carmelite Sister & all her friends in Carmel Connection. Rest in Peace. Prayers & Blessings! Sister Mary Robert Romano "

Arlene Hoffer wrote on Apr 4, 2019:

"I did not know Paula except her work in gathering us former sisters who were in Carmel. Her unselfish work towards a ( I thought) great reunion at Avila through the years was appreciated by me! I extend my condolences to her family and friends . I admired her glass art as well! Prayers for all those who were involved in her life closely or just a brief weekend at Avila!!! May she rest in PEACE. We will miss you Paula! Former Sr. Mary John Anthony... Arlene Hoffer "

Mary Ann Aguilar wrote on Apr 4, 2019:

"I was very sad to hear of Paula's passing , I too met Paula through our Carmelite reunions. I will be eternally grateful for all her hardwork to bring so many of us together. Sending prayers to Terry, Margaret and of course her family. She will be sorely missed. Mary Ann Aguilar"

Joan Connell wrote on Apr 2, 2019:

"I am so incredibly saddened to learn of Paula?s such a sudden and untimely manner. Although the changes that took place in all of our lives kept us apart geographically, Paula and you Terry have always been in my heart. I am so thankful that the 3 of us had that lunch date in Litchfield several years ago...our shared laughter melted the years away. And our times in Levittown...many dinners together, awesome garage sales and the building of the shed at 44 Forge Lane are memories of Paula that I will cherish forever. Life is so fragile...and Paula?s passing reminds us that none of us are in control of our time to leave our earthly bodies.....Terry, my heart is broken for you....."

Colleen Bicknese wrote on Apr 2, 2019:

"I am beyond sad to learn of Paula's passing. She, Marge and Terry are three great ladies that I have enjoyed bonding with over stained glass for more than a decade. So caring and loving, such a perfect partner to Terry. Holding all of you and the many friends whose names often came up in conversation in my heart. Rarely did Paula make stained glass for herself, it was always a gift for someone else. I will finish Santa in your honor dear friend."

Susan Trank wrote on Apr 1, 2019:

"What a beautiful tribute that captures the heart of Paula. She was a woman who was committed to healing - minds and spirits - and took the necessary steps to make that happen. It was a pleasure to be in her company. Terry and Margaret, please accept my deepest condolences to you and her family."

Judi Keane wrote on Apr 1, 2019:

"Little did we know that our high school classmate, Paula, would touch our lives in such a profound way. The memories of our get-togethers and shared friendship over the years will remain a valued treasure in our hearts forever. To Terry, Margaret, Elizabeth and the Bilton family ? I am holding you in prayer and wishing you peace. Paula, until ?we all? meet again, may God hold you in the palm of His hand. Love, Judi Keane"

Jean Cutrone wrote on Apr 1, 2019:

"Terry & Margaret -- What a devastating loss to you and Paula's family. She was a very special, loving and generous person who didn't know the word NO for anything needed. We worked so close for Carmel Connection and Paula could never be replaced. My prayers for all of you and God give you the strength to bear up with this loss. May Paula RIP. Jean--"

Marie Urban wrote on Apr 1, 2019:

" I met Paula in High School in the year 1959. Due to the fact Paula and I had the height we were always in line together. Due to the fact I was shorter than Paula she was behind me. I brought it to her attention on how she always would do something to aggravate me, like pushing or holding me back. Of course she did not remember. She was such a good friend and will be missed. My prayers are with all her loved ones and to always know she is in our hearts forever. Love Marie Urban"

Cathy Walters wrote on Apr 1, 2019:

"Paula certainly was a Gentle Giant with so many laughs and stories during our get together's at Sue's Christmas parties. She is a great loss to all Carmel Connection members, and will be always remembered as a leader, friend and advocate for all. She will be greatly missed. Fondly, Cathy Walters"

Pat Krasnausky wrote on Apr 1, 2019:

"Sixty years of friendship, shared experiences and shared friends will be treasured memories of our cherished Paula. Terry, Margaret, Pat, Billy, Buddy and Elizabeth, please know that you are in my heart as I pray for your consolation. Love, Pat K"

Maureen Hart wrote on Apr 1, 2019:

"Although I share a common backround with Paula, via Avila, we only became acquainted several years ago though the annual Christmas gathering of friends. I became fond of her and enjoyed sharing old stories. The lovely obit. truly describes the person I came to know. Maureen Hart"

Susan wrote on Mar 31, 2019:

"I work, played and created memories with Paula for over 40 years and cherish them all. She was a special person and I will miss here tremendously. "