"So sorry to hear this sad news enjoyed knowing and working in same building. A joyful person to know Steve Barnes"
In loving memory of
John Frederick Tompkins
John Frederick Tompkins, Ph.D., born July 22, 1948 in Des Moines, IA, joined the Church Triumphant suddenly on May 16, 2018 in Phoenix, AZ, after a short illness. John was adopted by Dorothy Dusenberry and Denzel Tompkins 6 days after his birth. They, a couple of years later, adopted a second child Robert Tompkins. Both adoptive parents preceded him in death.
In his adult life, John wanted more information about his birth family. Setting out on a search for them using two lawyers and a private investigator, John ran into a brick wall time and time again. The State of Iowa has some of the toughest laws dealing with adoptive records. Iowa has the nickname of the "Bastard State". Forgetting about the third element in the equation: the child. John persisted and discovered his birth family: Jim Milbourn (Marti), Jeff Milbourn (Barbara), Margo Burns-Nelligan (Scott) and Kirk Thomas. In May of 2016, the five siblings gathered for a week to greet their new brother and have maintained contact since.
John shared 28 wonderful years with his partner Michael Gregory who preceded him in death from liver cancer. Seeking the warm glow of the sun after all those years of frozen winters, John moved to Phoenix one week after he retired from the Des Moines Public Schools as their test administrator after 36 years. He often regaled his Phoenix friends with stories of the great flood of 1993. No water, no sewer... nothing for 10 days. More than his storytelling of days past, he loved to travel with Mitch Picklesimer his married spouse of 5 years. Reading anything he could put his hands on, kept his active mind happy with new adventures.
John enjoyed playing flute with Desert Overture - Phoenix's Premier LGTB and Ally Wind Symphony.
While in Des Moines, John was an active member of Plymouth Congregational Church (UCC) and in Phoenix he joined the Church of the Beatitudes Progressive Christian Church.
He attended Roosevelt High School in Des Moines, graduating with the Class of 1966. He served from 1972 to 1976 in the U.S. Air Force during the Vietnam War Era. John earned his BA in 1970 from University of Iowa, Masters in 1981 from Drake, and his Ph.D. in 1999 from Iowa State.
Cremation will take place with services being announced at a later date. A Memorial Service will be held in Phoenix, Arizona in early August 2018, the time and place will be announced. Arrangements by Hansen Mortuary. Visit https://hansenmortuary.wpengine.com for condolences.
Tributes
"In 2002 I transferred into the Des Moines Public Schools assessment department and was blessed to begin working with John on that team. Because of John?s happy, welcoming nature, from day one we became friends. In the mornings, John would greet everyone with a smile or a joking comment. Most days we would have lunch together and talk about our lives outside of work as well as issues at work. His presence made the workday light and time would fly. I was shocked and so saddened to hear that he died this week. I am sad that such a bright, happy person will not be in this world anymore. And I will (and do already) miss him. He always sent the first Christmas card every year that I received and he came back to Des Moines for my retirement party. In winter he would send texts of flowers blooming in Arizona- just to tease a little. He had a slightly irreverent sense of humor about others and himself. He was a warm person who really liked people. I know that John was blessed to have Mitch and his newly-found family in his life, as well as his brother and his niece in the earlier years of his life. My thoughts and prayers go out to you all at this sad time. Words cannot express all my feelings ? I was blessed to know him ? he was a true friend."
"I had the wonderful opportunity to be John?s neighbor in Beaverdale for nearly 20 years before his departure to AZ. He was a kind, smart, and gentle soul. I spent many evenings and weekends on his patio after work discussing the events of the day. He was a true superb conversationalist and could recall historical events with amazing detail. It was always so comforting to have him next door as a neighbor and a friend. I so appreciated his encouragement and support as I went back to school as he always believed I would be successful. I am heartbroken to hear of his passing. My thoughts, prayers, and love to you Mitch and all of his family. He will be truly missed!"
"Mitch first reached out to myself and my brother Jim in April of 2015 informing us we had a half brother we knew nothing about. To say we were shocked is an understatement. We slowly started to communicate with John and learned much about our mother Marjorie that we did not know. John and Mitch organized a gathering of the siblings at a house in Scotsdale in 2016 which was the first time Jim, Margo, and Kirk had met John. I had met John and Mitch earlier when I traveled to Mt. Ayr Iowa to meet them and research Marjorie's birth records. The siblings were officially designated "Marjorie's Miracles" and of course T-shirts printed. My wife Barbara and I live in the Tucson area and were able to grow very close to John and Mitch and take some wonderful trips together. John's sudden passing was a huge shock and has left a very large hole in our hearts. We miss this dear warm hearted man and brother so much there are not words to say it. Rest in peace my dear brother."
"What a fine person John was. I worked with John in the Des Moines Public Schools on a number of test projects and issues. He was especially helpful on the districtwide composition test. John was bright, hard working, and always helpful. He was one of the best. I am so sorry to read of his passing."
"I?m so sad to hear about John. He was such a dear, whitty man. I?m so sorry for your loss Mitch. Take care. Nancy Boyd"
"Met John my brother for the first time and Mitch about two years ago ..We so enjoyed the time spent with them .in a family reunion type atmosphere It was a beautiful home they had rented for the get together . Their generousty was amazing . I was so taken by their warmth . My husband Scott and I cared about John and Mitch very much , We are so saddened by his passing and can?t beliieve our earthly time is over . We felt blessed we did get to meet and spend some quality time thanks to the perseverence of Mitch and John . Rip John , you were a wonderful blessing . And Mitch we hope to continue our relationship and may God bless you in this time of need. You are truly in our thoughts and prayers .Mitch thank-you for taking such good care of John in good and bad times till death do you part ."