"I just learned of Palmer's passing, and my condolences go out to his family. I have been electronic friends with Palmer for almost 20 years, having worked with him occasionally at IBM. He and I had similar jobs at IBM but in different product areas. We would often commiserate on our jobs (both good and bad), and he was truly a sweet man. I will miss him. --Sharon Garduno"
In loving memory of
Palmer L. Kocher
December 28, 1943 - December 28, 2020
Palmer Leroy Kocher of West Hurley, 77, passed away peacefully with his dog, Sandy, by his side on Monday, December 28 in Haddonfield, New Jersey.
He had been there doing what he loved most, spending time with his family.
Asked several years ago how he wanted to be remembered, Palmer said simply that he hoped he'd be remembered as a good father, and answered humbly that folks might think "that Palmer Kocher, he was all right."
He was more than all right, he was the best.
Palmer was born to Ruth & Albert Kocher in New Cumberland, Pennsylvania on December 28, 1943, joining his older sister, Shirley Cole. 9-years his senior, Shirley still resides outside of Harrisburg today. Affectionately known as "Butch" in his early years, on his first day of school his mom wrote his real name on his hand.
He met his future wife, Linda Ann Weigel, on the Cedar Cliff High School band bus. They would marry on the hottest day of the year, Sunday, June 11, 1967 and start a family soon after. They welcomed Christopher William, Jeffrey Robert, Michael Scott and Gillian Elizabeth in the years that were to come.
For more than 50 years, Palmer spent his work days at IBM before heading home to be a part of the litany of activities the children would be involved in. From Hurley Little League, to Hurley Woods soccer and the Boy Scouts Troop 166, he was always dedicated to his children and their pursuits. When his youngest son, Mike, was in college he and Linda would spend their weekends traveling hundreds of miles to see his baseball games.
One summer, home from college, Palmer's son Jeff expressed interest in joining the West Hurley Fire Department. This was a transformative moment in Palmer's life, as both he and Linda joined together. With Palmer driving the ambulance and Linda attending to those in need as an EMT, they would touch countless lives. After Linda's passing in 2010, Palmer continued his work with the fire department, serving as a Commissioner, and as recently as Thanksgiving Day, responding to a call.
In addition to his passion for the fire department, he took great pride in his therapy dog, Sandy. The duo brought comfort to those impacted by crisis both locally and nationally, and visited Albany International Airport weekly to greet passengers coming and going. He also launched a second career later in life as an adjunct professor at SUNY New Paltz teaching math. He enjoyed this job immensely, and was committed to never retiring from it, a promise that he fulfilled.
Palmer fulfilled so many promises in his life. He fulfilled all of his promises to his wife, Linda, loving her until her dying day and every day after. He fulfilled his promise to his children of giving them a better life than he had. He fulfilled his promise to his grandchildren to always being there for them, playing any game they wanted and, of course, being the holder of ride tickets in Ocean City. And we think he also fulfilled a promise to himself - to live a life that he would be happy to do over, and over, and over again.
We would do it over again.
Palmer was known under many names, starting with Butch and extending to Husband, Dad, Pops, Paul, Big Bopper, Pa, Grandpa and many more, and while the names and ways we remember him will be unique to everyone he knew, they will all be surrounded with so much love.
From all of your children, we are because you were, and we will love you forever.
In lieu of flowers, the family is asking donations be made in Palmer's memory to the West Hurley Fire Department or The Good Dog Foundation in Hudson, New York (https://thegooddogfoundation.org/).
Surviving are his children, Christopher Kocher, wife Marnie and their children Sterling, Sadie and Penelope; Jeffrey Kocher, wife Julia and their children Smyth and Dylan; Michael Kocher, wife Denise Maltese and their children Linden, Peter and Eden; and Gillian Kocher and partner Casey Holcombe; and his sister, Shirley Cole. He is also survived by his beloved dog, Sandy, who will remain with the family and be a constant reminder of Palmer.
Due to COVID-19, funeral services will be private. The family is inviting those who loved Palmer to a drive by memorial at the West Hurley Fire Department on Tuesday, January 5 at 6pm.
A Celebration of Life is planned for Saturday, June 12 at the West Hurley Fire Department.
Tributes
"Professor Kocher taught me statistics my freshman year at SUNY New Paltz. He often mentioned his family with fondness and was always willing to stay after class to help students like myself who had lingering questions. His sense of humor, his support and the love that he openly showed for his family and his dog won't soon be forgotten. My deepest condolences to the Kocher family. "
"I was so sorry to hear of Palmer's passing. He was a wonderful husband, dad and all around great person. May he rest in peace. "
"To the Kocher family --- Patty and I are deeply saddened to hear the very sad news of Palmer. What a gentleman, always had a smile on his face, and was such a positive man - he will be missed by so many that knew him. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the family. Bob and Patty Kozak "
"Dear Family We are so sad to hear of Palmer?s passing. Our deepest sympathies. Palmer was a wonderful father and we so enjoyed him coaching our daughter for softball!! Great role model. You are in our prayers!"
"Mr. Kocher was my math teacher this semester and I had attended his office hours once and he was the sweetest ever. He was great and I wish I had met him in person. My prayers go out to his family and friends. God rest him.??"
"Mr Kocher was my statistics and public policy professor at SUNY New Paltz in the fall of 2019. He was such a caring person with a tremendously big heart. I remember him bringing his dog Sandy into the library during finals season to help kids destress. His soul and spirit was like no other. Sending my thoughts and prayers to Mr Kocher and his friends and family and all those who had loved him throughout his long life??"
"I only met Mr. Kocher once. I Have a therapy dog and I was impressed by his enthusiasm for their visits to Albany Airport. It was a pleasure to meet a gentlemen who was so sincerely devoted to bringing peace to others. He spoke with tremendous love of his partner, Sandy whom I know he is waiting for......"
"May loving memories of Palmer ? and there certainly are many given his big heart, amazing support of his family, and the positive impact he had on so many people ? provide comfort to the Kocher family and to everyone mourning such a wonderful man. "
"Mr. Kocher was a professor of mine and very recently wrote me a letter of recommendation for graduate school. I am very grateful to have had him as a teacher and loved listening to him talk about his dog, Sandy. He was one of my favorite professors to have at New Paltz and that says a lot because I dread math. Sending everyone in his family love. ??"
"Professor Palmer taught me last semester and even under the circumstances proved to be an excellent, thoughtful, and kind professor. He helped me understand and thrive in a subject I had always had much difficulty in. My condolences are with his family and friends."
"Our heartfelt condolences to Palmer?s friends and family. He will be sorely missed. "
"My deepest sympathy to the family. Palmer was always great to work with, and he helped me out many times over a 25 year span. Palmer was well known to IBM'ers around the globe, and he will be greatly missed. "
"To get to know someone better, go camping with them. It was easy to be friends with Palmer."
"Palmer was a good friend and will be missed."
"Deepest sympathies to the Kocher family. I worked with Palmer for over 20 years. He was always a pleasure to work with and I valued his knowledge and expertise immensely. He was a great friend and we would both share personal struggles and joys. He was always a source of comfort to me. Our loss is heaven?s gain. Pete Fenaroli "
"My heart and my prayers go out to you and your family Jeff. May God bring you comfort and peace in remembering how wonderful your father was in everyone's life. Much love and may God bless you and your family. Always, True Dean"
"I can remember meeting a nicer man than Palmer. I worked with him at IBM in the 80's. I again knew him when I moved to West Hurley and my husband Bill was in the Boy Scout troop with him. The tribute you have written is spot on. He was a wonderful guy."