Anthony Brian Kirmil, 71, of Portsmouth, RI passed away peacefully at his home surrounded by his loving family. He was the husband to the love of his life, Sue, for over 48 years. He was the absolute best dad one could ask for to his children Aimee (Kirmil) Lyden and her husband Jason of Walpole, MA, Leigh Kirmil of Wakefield, RI, Scott Kirmil and his wife Adrienne of Jamestown, RI, Krissy Kirmil of Richmond, RI, and his nephew Richard Dougan of Newport, RI. He was also beloved Poppi to his five grandchildren, Cailyn, Sean, Breslin, Hope and Luke. The love and close bond he shared with all of his grandchildren is irreplaceable and will never be forgotten.
Born in Canton, MA in 1952, Brian was the son of the late Anthony J. and Rita M. (LePine) Kirmil. Besides his parents, he was also predeceased by his sister Janet Nelson.
Brian graduated from Immaculate High School in Danbury, CT where he met one of his lifelong best friends, John Mulvihill. When he arrived at Fairfield University, he immediately met several other forever friends including Gary Dittrich and Mark Cronin, his lifelong best friend who was there by his side to the very end.
When Brian was 16, he met his wife Sue who was only 14, but they knew it was love at first sight. Eventually, they created a family that reflected the love they had for each other. They enjoyed many adventures together and were always there for each other, through it all. Even after 48 years of marriage, Brian still made it a point to stop whatever he was doing, to sing and dance with Sue when an old favorite song came on. He was her knight in shining armor and she was the love of his life.
Brian graduated from Fairfield University with a BS in Psychology and went on to earn his master's in Special Education at Southern CT University. He worked in education across a few districts and in different roles around Connecticut before securing his dream job as Principal at the Rockwell Elementary School in Bethel, CT where he worked for 18 years. Throughout the years he played guitar and sang in a wedding band with his father, Tony, appropriately named TKay5. Somehow Brian still found time to share his gift of music with his church community. He was devoted to ensuring music brought people together during mass at St. Joseph's Church in Danbury, later at St. Rose in Newtown, and most recently at St. Barnabas Church in Portsmouth. His distinctly deep voice, paired with his guitar, brought the church to life and you couldn't help but sing along.
Upon retirement in 2013 Brian answered what he felt was a calling from God, and returned to work part time as an assistant principal at the Sandy Hook Elementary School shortly after it reopened following the tragedy there. He felt he wanted to be a part of the healing and guidance that he knew the community needed. After a few years in that position, he and Sue moved to RI where they purchased a beautiful home with the waterview they had always dreamed of. The house and his welcoming spirit made it quickly become the center of his family and friend's lives.
Brian led a life of service to others. He was deeply devoted to his family and would do anything for them. They will forever cherish memories of days at the pool where he grilled, served drinks, played Jimmy Buffett, and made everyone laugh with his cannonballs...he was truly the center of his family's world. Brian/Dad/Poppi made sure he took every chance he got to tell his family how much he loved them and how proud he was of them. He never took anything for granted. He thoroughly enjoyed so many things with his family including but not limited to celebrating every holiday and birthday as a family, annual Christmas traditions like holiday sing-alongs, helping at Scott's restaurants as the in-house maintenance man, babysitting his grandchildren every chance he had, and sending texts to be sure people knew he was thinking of them. He loved volunteering his time and effort to make sure those around him had what they needed. The loss of Brian/Dad/Poppi is unimaginable but his family asks that those who knew him remember the lessons they learned from his example and move forward to show acts of kindness towards others in his honor.
A Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated on Wednesday, May 24th at 12pm at St. Barnabas Church, 1697 East Main Road, Portsmouth, RI. Burial will be private.
Donations in his name may be made to Hope Hospice and Palliative Care of RI at 1085 N Main Street Providence, RI 02904 or at http://HopeHealthCo.org
Nancy Valdez wrote on May 25, 2023:
"I just heard of Brians passing. My condolences to his family and all those who knew how kind and wonderful Brian was. He was my mentor during our days teaching together in Danbury. 34years ago Brian invited me , my husband and 4 year old son to his home for one of his Christmas celebrations. It remains one of my most precious memories. To Brians family - May your hearts heal with beautiful memories you have.
Kevin Durkin wrote on May 24, 2023:
"Brian and I went Immaculate high school together, he was class if 70 and I was 71.
The most perfect gentleman that anyone could imagine.
Later I became the sales and catering manager at Ethan Allen Inn.
Brian and his Dad were the wedding of choice for all our affairs.
I am so grateful for the times we shared after high School.
You will never be forgotten my frien!"
James J Hastings wrote on May 24, 2023:
"Mr. Kirmil is a name I am very familiar with. I hear it about twenty times a year over the last 17 years. My wife, Karen Finga was a second-grade teacher while Brian was her Principle. From Fall to Thanksgiving then on to Christmas, holiday after holiday Karen changes the decorations she has put out around the house. She makes sure that as soon as the day passes the ?old? season?s decoration come down, because Mr. Kirmil would always stop by her classroom to remind her to change the decorations. So, she tells me so. She also tells me what a leader he was, how he handled difficult parents, and rambunctious children. She regals his temperament, his ability to handle all situations. We will not miss him because he is always with us. He made a difference God bless Mr. Kirmil he is a dear friend."
Darli Ebling wrote on May 24, 2023:
"I am so very sorry for your loss. I met Brian when he first came to work as Assistant Principal at Hurlbutt Elementary school in Weston. He was a very special, caring individual. No matter what kind of day it was, Brian always had a morning song on his guitar and would sign off. :? Have a sparkling day?.
He led a sparkling life, touched many lives and will be remembered by all.
Darli Ebling "
Cate Gosselin wrote on May 23, 2023:
"To the Kirmil Family,
I remember Brian both at St. Rose Church, where he played guitar at mass and ended with "Have a Sparkling Day", and then having him as our Assistant Principal at Sandy Hook School when we took over Chalk Hill in Monroe. He was always with his guitar, his soothing voice, and a desire to show love to everyone, especially the children. He walked the halls of our school and listened carefully to whoever needed him at that moment. Though he will be missed, he left a legacy of love, compassion and music for all to remember. You have been richly blessed with his presence, and so have we.
In sympathy for your loss,
Rene C. and Pearl Concepcion wrote on May 22, 2023:
"Please accept our deepest sympathy to the Kirmil family.
May the good Lord grant Mr. Kirmil eternal rest and everlasting peace. Amen.
Concepcion family, Bethel, CT"
Anne Ktorides wrote on May 22, 2023:
"Such sad news, we send our very deepest condolences. Stan and I were just shattered yesterday when we saw the announcement - we had no idea. Sue, you and Brian were such an important part of our lives as we got established in the area here, and we have always loved you like family. Thinking back to our young families growing together remains one of the best periods of our lives. Memories through every season are filled with your generosity of spirit, friendship, inspiration and support. Our lives are so much better for having known you. Brian will be sorely missed... may his memory be eternal. You have all our love forever. God Bless you all."
Chrissy Coffey-Carboni wrote on May 21, 2023:
"Dear Sue and your lovely children and grandchildren,
Hearing the news of Brian's passing was shocking to me. Brian was so full of life and positivity and encouragement, I can not imagine your family without him. My memories of him extend from DHS when he was our class of 84 Advisor, to my babysitting adventures at your home, to our professional days when I would see Brian as a principal and I was a teacher. He was passionate about everything he did, and his passion affected everyone he came in contact with. He was always kind and caring and patient with his students, staff and family. There will be many voids without him. Thank goodness for the countless wonderful memories he provided for all of us who knew him. God Bless all of you as you celebrate a life well lived and carry on his legacy in all you do."
Loraine Seder wrote on May 21, 2023:
Tony and TKay5 will always have a special place in our hearts.
TKay5 was a very talented band that made our wedding day very special! (7/4/81, Ethan Allen Inn)
Tony and his Dad connected with our family and everyone they met!
Tony?s life and voice gave us beautiful memories!
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Loraine & Ed Seder
Love Lives On
Author: ~ Amanda Bradley ~
Those we love are never really lost to us--
we feel them in so many special ways--
through friends they always cared about
and dreams they left behind,
in beauty that they added to our days...
in words of wisdom, we still carry with us
and memories that never will be gone...
Those we love
are never really lost to us--
for everywhere their special love lives on.
Katie Moser wrote on May 21, 2023:
"I had the privilege of singing with Brian, accompanied by his gifted guitar playing, for many wonderful years at St. Rose of Lima in Newtown. He was such a blessing to us all. Brian had an incredible gift of making everyone he spoke to feel they were important to him. I will miss this amazing man. God rest his soul. I have no doubt he is in the arms of God."
Karen L Fischer Perkins wrote on May 21, 2023:
"To the Family, 5 /21/23
So sorry for your sad loss..I went to High School with Brian, and worked with him years later in the Weston CT Public School District, as well as recently seeing him at out 50th High School reunion. He was always polite, kind, and helpful..So sorry for your sad loss..May fond memories, the support of family & friends, and the Holy Spirit, the Comforter, be with you at this time.
With Prayers and Sympathy,
Karen L Fischer Perkins "
Ronni Allen wrote on May 20, 2023:
"My family was lucky enough to cross paths with ?Mr Kirmil ? at Rockwell Elementary school. When I first met him I was amazed how he knew every child's name. His soft demeanor made him likable to them and approachable with stories for him about an experience they had and he listened to them all. I had the pleasure of serving on the PTO, so I got to know Brian well. We shared many laughs during those meetings. My kids now in their 20?s were able to share memories of him such as the Halloween parade and Mr. Kirmil dancing to ?the Monster Mash?. He has made a huge impact on our family as well as the Bethel and Rockwell community. Our lives are 100% better for knowing him. Our condolences to his family. "
Ruth and Bill Doran wrote on May 20, 2023:
"Brian was such a kind, caring and compassionate man. He and Sue were a true storybook couple. They were a wonderful example of a Catholic marriage. My deepest sympathy to Sue, Aimee, Leigh, Scott and Krissy. How fitting that Brian passed to the Lord on Ascension Thursday. He will await you at the gates of Paradise..
Sending love and comforting hugs. Offering prayers for your entire family as you deal with this tremendous loss. ???????"
Louise Loya Mayne wrote on May 20, 2023:
"My most heartfelt condolences to Brian's family. I was good friends with Janet. I worked with Mr. Kirmil at Roberts Ave School and Brian in Bethel.
Many fond memories.
? Louise IHS '72"
Jane Gangi wrote on May 20, 2023:
"Brian was principal of Rockwell when my son, Peter, was there. Peter and his friend, Emily, were advanced in math and Brian did more than any parent could ever ask to accelerate them. He arranged for them in 2nd grade to go to Johnson school for 4th grade math and, then, in 3rd grade to go to Johnson for 5th grade math. Emily is now a veterinarian and Peter is a high school math teacher with his master's degree. Brian would be so proud of them! I remember one day talking with Brian in the parking lot about how arranging all this must be an administrative headache for him. Brian responded by circling his arms to the sky, saying, "Fly! Fly!" "
The Marino's wrote on May 20, 2023:
"We are so sorry for your loss. Sending love, prayers and strength. Continue to live in his honor.
Sara Zablocki Klinger wrote on May 20, 2023:
"I had the pleasure of working with Brian at Rockwell School. A great principal & man. He won?t be forgotten. Sending prayers to the family at this difficult time. "
Ferris Family wrote on May 20, 2023:
"The memory of Mr. Kirmil taking my son by the hand to tour Rockwell before he started Kindergarten will always be with me. He was such a gift to the students, parents and staff and often the reason we all had a ?sparkling day!?"
Meghan wrote on May 20, 2023:
"I had Principal Kirmil at Rockwell as did my sister. Upon the news of his passing we shared our memories of him. He used to always tell us to have a ?sparkling day?, played guitar and sang to us, and was the definition of an involved and caring educator. It?s obvious he was a great man. I hope his family knows how many lives he truly touched. "
Joyce Blessing wrote on May 20, 2023:
"What a beautiful tribute to a legend
of a man. My son (who is graduating High school this year) are better people because he was in their lives. My condolences to his family and friends may your fond memories bring you comfort as you grieve "
Rose Anne Von Hollen wrote on May 20, 2023:
"I knew Brian when I worked at Berry School and later Bethel Middle School. Brian loved to sing to his students when he was at Rockwell School. He was so very kind to all he met. My condolences to his family.
Rose Anne Von Hollen"
Lillian Joyce wrote on May 19, 2023:
"We were fortunate to know Brian through our Rockwell family where our sons learned to love learning and looked forward to being personally greeted by name by their principal many mornings (he knew everyone?s name). We still give a ?seal of approval? and a ?round of applause?? a fond memory from childhood. Our condolences to the family, he impacted so many children in his tenure. Love from the Joyce Family "
Joe Nero wrote on May 19, 2023:
" I went to high school and played basketball with Brian at Morris St. school thanks to him getting the key to the gym from his father who was the school?s principal. He was a kind and wonderful man who made everyone feel like he was your best friend. I last saw him at our 50th high school reunion and he made me feel like no time had passed . Condolences to his family ,"